I recently found this email in my Sent folder. To this day, I wonder if it was my sense of desperation that prevented each of seventeen people in my life from permitting me to offer them twenty dollars so that I could step inside one of their homes for a period of a half an hour so that I could take a shower — or whether it was “something else.”
From : andypope7 at zoho dot com
To : [17 friends and family members]
Date : Mon, 11 Jul 2016 13:51:40 -0800
Subject : Shower?
Dear Friends and Family Members:
I kinda hate to approach you all in this fashion, but I don’t really have a cell phone now, and as you all know, I disdain to beg for change. Not to mention, they’ve ripped out the pay phone by the library, outside of which I’ve been camping out these days. I hope somebody will get back to me.
I really need a shower. I’m not used to this neck of the woods, and I can’t just go hang out at the Multi-Agency Service Center like I could in Berkeley, where I could usually be assured of a shower in the morning, though I often had to wait for over three hours with about fifty other people, and sometimes would have my things ripped off during the brief period of time I was allotted for my shower.
As you know, I don’t drink, and I’m honestly not on drugs or anything like that. I have twenty bucks I can give you for your trouble. I promise I’ll be in and out really fast, and I won’t leave a towel on the bathroom floor, as someone complained about last time I tried this. Honestly I’m totally clean, I just need to get cleaner enough to put on some decent clothes I got at Goodwill and hopefully pound the pavement and find a job pretty soon.
I’m only asking a half hour of your time. I really really really need a shower. Can anybody help me with this? I’d really appreciate it.
Only one person replied, which was kind of him. Now, in deference to that person’s kindness, I must admit that I have not been able to find the exact email. I did, however, have several conversations with this individual (whom we shall call “Randy”) during that period of time. So I recall that this is the basic gist of what he had said. I hope you can appreciate the disparity in our viewpoints here.
From : “Randy McRiddle”<firstname.lastname@example.org>
To : “andypope at zoho dot com”
Date : Mon, 11 Jul 2016 15:28:17 -0800
Subject : Re: Shower?
Hey Andy –
I talked to my wife about this, and I’d like to help you. But we let a homeless guy in here last year, and it turned out he had lice. It was a real hassle getting rid of all the lice.
Also, to be quite honest with you, my daughter is home from school for the summer, and she gets really freaked by those kinds of people. You understand.
If it was just me myself, I’d probably consider helping you. But I’ve got the wife and kid to think about.
Hope it works out for you, trying to find a job.
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