Tuesday Tuneup 109

Q. Where would you like to be?

A. In a place of lesser anxiety.

Q. Are you more anxious than usual?

A. Well, duh! Why else would I have answered as I did?

Q. Why are you being flippant?

A. I don’t know.

Q. Any ideas?

A. Probably a combination of being annoyed by you, and the internal function of anxiety which tends to increase the extent to which I drift onto tangents.

Q. Do you think of your flippancy as a mere tangent?

A. It wasn’t a mere tangent, just a tangent.

Q. What else was it, besides being a tangent?

A. Are you saying it was rude or sarcastic?

Q. Didn’t I ask you?

A. All right then, it was rude and sarcastic, as well as flippant and tangential. Any further condemnation of my character?

Q. Why are you on my case?

A. Why are you on MY case?

Q. Didn’t I ask you first?

A. All right, so I’m not in the best of moods. Too much to do, not enough time to do it in. But that doesn’t give you the right to nag at me like you do.

Q. You think I’m nagging you, do you?

A. Yes.

Q. Was there someone else in your past who nagged you? Why are you transferring your failed personal relationships onto me?

A. Because they are unresolved.

Q. Why aren’t you grateful?

A. Grateful for what, may I ask?

Q. Hasn’t one such relationship been resolved?

A. Oh my God – I almost forgot!!

Q. Waking up now?

A. Yes.

Q. Fully awake?

A. More-or-less.

Q. Grateful?

A. Immensely.

Q. How do you feel now that your friend and you have been reconciled?

A. I feel as though a huge blob of congestion has been removed from my body. I literally feel ten pounds lighter.

Q. May I remind you of something?

A. Remind me later. I’ve got too much work to do. Let’s talk next Tuesday.

The Questioner is silent.

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